FINDING MYSELF IN THE SILENCE

How the Pandemic Led Me to My True Calling

Before the world paused, I was living a life that looked perfectly fine on paper. But inside, I was exhausted. I was empty.

After graduating in Culinary Arts in Italy, I jumped right into the workforce. I worked in various restaurants, and later transitioned into a stockhouse job. The pay was decent, the routine was stable, and from the outside, things seemed okay. But I wasn’t happy. I wasn’t living — I was merely surviving. I worked long hours, barely had time for myself, and most importantly, I wasn’t doing anything that truly lit up my soul. I was stuck in a cycle: work, earn, rest, repeat.

Then the pandemic happened. Everything stopped. The rush, the noise, the routine — it all came to a halt. I was asked to stay home for a few months. Though the salary was reduced, the time I gained back was invaluable. I finally had a chance to breathe. To think. To feel.

During those quiet, uncertain months, I began meditating, praying, and reflecting. It was the first time in years I had listened to my inner voice — the one I had buried under responsibility and routine.

That voice reminded me of my dreams. It reminded me of the version of myself I had always wanted to be, but never had the courage to pursue.

With everything moving online, opportunities started to appear — and for the first time, I chose to follow curiosity instead of fear. I found an online acting course for beginners, taught by an award-winning Filipina actress. It felt like a small step, just something to try. But looking back now, I see it was the beginning of everything. That course opened a door I never thought I could walk through. I didn’t just enjoy it — I felt alive.

As the course evolved, so did I.

Eventually, the studio began focusing on the Meisner Technique, and I enrolled in that too. I later joined an acting program with Aktor Philippines — a rare opportunity led by some of the most respected names in the Philippine acting industry. It was humbling. It was surreal. And it was life-changing.

One of the people who influenced me the most was Miss Angeli Bayani, an actress whose mentorship helped shape the artist I am becoming. Her guidance didn’t just teach me how to act — she taught me how to be.

I still remember our final audition-style exam, where we performed in front of real directors and actors. The feedback I received was something I never imagined hearing in my life. For the first time, I truly believed: Maybe I can do this.

After the pandemic, I faced another crossroad. Should I go back to the Philippines and try to build a career there? Or should I stay here in Europe and try to create something new?

I asked Miss Angeli for advice, and she encouraged me to explore opportunities here first — reminding me how many actors dream of breaking into the European scene. So, I stayed. I tried.

And here I am now — not just working, but living as the artist I never thought I could be.

But the journey didn’t stop there. As I started exploring acting in person and taking real steps into this newfound creative life, another door opened.

And through that journey, I encountered yet another incredible person — someone who saw the potential in me, even when I was still figuring things out. Since that moment, they’ve been guiding me, mentoring me, and helping me grow in ways I never expected.

It’s rare to find someone who not only supports your dreams, but also helps you stretch beyond them.

So here I am — an actor, a musician, an artist.

All of this started with stillness, with listening, with choosing myself — even when it felt uncertain.

So to anyone reading this: it’s never too late to listen to that quiet voice within.

The one that dreams. The one that knows who you are before the world told you who to be.

Sometimes, all it takes is a pause — and the courage to begin.